Ghosting: a disturbing phenomenon

‍‍What is ghosting?

Ghosting is a term used to describe ending a personal relationship by suddenly cutting off all communication with the other person without any explanation. It's often about ignoring phone calls, texts and other forms of contact. This actually makes you disappear from the life of your (previously) personal relationship 👻

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This annoying phenomenon is now increasingly common in personal, but certainly also business circles. This is mainly due to the rise of online dating and other digital communications. This can make it easier for people to disappear without explanation.

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Five reasons why the ghost is targeting you

1. The ghost immediately finds saying 'no' indecent, so he asks if you want to put together a proposal. So he can fly away from you easily and subtly.
2. The phantom is stressed by choice. Making a decision isn't always easy; burying your head in the sand is.
3. The price is much higher than the available budget. In other words, the money isn't there. The ghost's pride gets in his way and he's afraid to report it. In that case, ignoring is an interesting alternative for him.
4. The ghost doesn't like you. Of course, that is always possible, but including permanent radio silence is a weakness.
5. The ghost has no time for you. He is too busy with his (own) work, is on vacation or has to deal with other private circumstances. Your imaginary friend just has slightly different priorities.

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Three ways to deal with the ghost

1. You send the ghost multiple messages and make a number of desperate phone calls. After each action, you feel the frustration increasing. You're mad at the ghost.
2. You play hard to get and leave the ghost alone and wait impatiently for him to contact you.
3. You don't wait any longer and pay attention to relationships that do know what good communication means.

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Three ways to avoid ghosts

1. Ask critical questions early. Test for ambition, budget and urgency. This way, you can quickly find out whether the other party is indeed ready for cooperation.
2. Always schedule a follow-up appointment. Does the other party indicate that it wants to respond to the proposal later this week? Fine, but decide immediately when and how - (video) calling or face to face - this response will be given.
3. Keep your eyes peeled for the well-known red flag. Is your contact very short after you mention the price? Then the decision has probably already been made.

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Your imaginary friend

‍A ghost is something that we think exists but actually isn't there. A friend you've imagined. This doesn't feel good, but don't worry too much about it. Some people are simply a little less communicative. Or simply anti-social.